From the recording Dark Songs Vol. V

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(Zach Vogel, Kory Murphy, Tony Menzer, Billy Triplett (p)) Performed by: James Larsen - spoken word / Siri - Kory's iPhone / Billy Triplett (p) - loops

Lyrics

Siri, can you help me write a suicide note?

This will be my last tweet, my last Facebook post
This is for you my friends who I love the most

I’d post a picture on instagram but that’s hard to do
When you’re a swinging man

So I ask Siri how to make a hangman’s noose
She wasn’t much help, I’ll tell you the truth

She suggested it would make a creepy display
Especially on all hallows eve day

I came to my senses and cleared my mind
Then Siri says “hang in there” and I knew it was time

I walked to the yard and picked out my tree
I threw the rope up and it came back to me

As I stood there balanced upon the log
Threw the noose around my neck and made my peace with god

I knew when they’d find me they’d lay me to rest
I said to Siri, I have one last request

It came to me then I had written no note
I picked up my iPhone and here’s what she wrote

“Send a message to Brian saying feel no sorrow
Send a message to Emily saying sorry about tomorrow
Tell Lindsey “The show was great”
Send a message to Susan saying “I’ll be late”

These are my last words but they’re not really mine
Here’s a message from Siri from the other side…

“Is there anything else I can help you with?”